The Inevitable Surprises of Parenting: Lessons Learned
As parents, we strive to impart important life lessons to our children, aiming to prepare them for future challenges and opportunities. However, our well-intentioned efforts can sometimes yield unexpected and humorously counterproductive outcomes.
When my older son was about three or four, we noticed he was becoming very spoiled and materialistic. Despite our efforts to make him appreciate what he had, he constantly begged for every toy, candy, and treat he saw. Around that time, I came across a photo spread of children worldwide with their most prized possessions.
We looked through the photos and discussed each one. When we got to a picture of a boy with a well-loved stuffed monkey, my son stared at it for a long time. I thought he finally understood the lesson. After a long silence, he smiled sweetly and said, “I want that monkey.”
I also tried teaching my kids about earning money through chores. Instead of expecting an allowance, they were to bid against each other for chores. This backfired when they started asking, “How much will you pay me?” every time I requested their help.
I encouraged my children to always have a good reason for their actions to curb impulsive behavior. This resulted in them constantly explaining their actions with elaborate justifications.
One of my five-year-old twins occasionally had accidents because she got too engrossed in play. We offered a special prize for days without accidents. This led her twin sister, who was previously fine, to start having accidents to get prizes too.
A book suggested asking kids for appropriate punishments for misbehavior. When our six-year-old pinched his brother, we asked what his punishment should be. He said, “Pluck out my eyeballs and throw me over a cliff.” We didn’t follow through and stopped reading parenting books.
When my kids begged for a pet, I told them they could have one if they kept their room clean for six months. The youngest cleaned his room, moved his sleeping bag to the hallway, and locked his door to keep it clean while he slept outside.
I taught my 16-year-old to compliment people who insulted her. At a store, when a woman was rude to my mother, my daughter, then four, told the woman, “Your teeth are such a pretty yellow!”
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