In three decades, the largest single order he had ever delivered was five gallons—for a particularly ambitious Fourth of July ice-cream social.
Surely, he reasoned, she must have meant 2.5 gallons.
Later that morning, after finishing his route, Arthur returned and knocked firmly on Cassandra’s door.
She appeared in a shimmering silk kimono, looking entirely composed.
“Good morning, Arthur,” she said. “You received my order?”
“I did,” he replied, removing his cap. “But I wanted to confirm… did you perhaps mean two-and-a-half gallons?”
Cassandra smiled patiently.
“No. Twenty-five gallons is exactly what I need. I intend to fill my bathtub with milk and take a restorative soak—just as Cleopatra did.”
Arthur blinked.
A bathtub.
Full of milk.
“Well,” he said carefully, “if that’s your plan… I can arrange it. But for the invoice—would you like it pasteurized?”
Cassandra froze.
The word triggered an entirely different image in her mind—one involving boiling liquid and unfortunate consequences.
“Pasteurized?” she repeated, mildly offended. “Goodness, no. Just up to my chest. I’ll need space at the top so I can splash some on my face without it spilling over.”
Arthur stood very still.
It took every ounce of his professional discipline not to laugh.
“I see,” he managed.
Cassandra nodded, pleased.
“I don’t need to submerge my head. That would be excessive.”
Arthur tipped his cap again.
“I’ll bring the milk shortly, ma’am. I’ll make sure it stops exactly where you need it.”
As he walked back to his truck, he reflected that beauty might be skin-deep—but misunderstandings could run much deeper.
Driving toward the depot to fulfill the strangest order of his career, he wondered whether Cleopatra had ever required such detailed logistical support.
Back inside her house, Cassandra hummed happily as she prepared the bathroom, convinced that by noon she would emerge transformed—radiant, youthful, and glowing with ancient elegance.
After all, in the pursuit of beauty, a small misunderstanding of terminology seemed like a perfectly reasonable price to pay.