When my husband, Jake, handed me a schedule titled “How to Be a Better Wife,” I was floored. Instead of reacting, I chose to play along, fully aware Jake was about to learn a serious lesson about marriage.
In our relationship, I’ve always been the calm, reasonable one, while Jake is easily swept up in the latest trend—whether it’s a new hobby or some YouTube video claiming to offer life-changing advice in three simple steps. Everything was fine until Jake met Steve.
Steve was the type who believed being loud made him right. He’d bulldoze through conversations, offering unsolicited relationship tips despite being perpetually single. To my surprise, Jake started to admire Steve’s confidence and began echoing his toxic ideas.
At first, I didn’t think much of it. But then Jake’s comments started to hit harder. “Steve says marriages work best when the wife takes control of the household,” or, “Steve thinks women should always look good for their husbands, no matter how long they’ve been together.”
I brushed off these remarks with sarcasm, but the change in Jake was clear. He’d roll his eyes when I ordered takeout instead of cooking or sigh if I didn’t get around to laundry—never mind that I have a full-time job.
Then one evening, Jake presented me with “The List.”
With a tone I didn’t recognize, he slid a piece of paper across the table. “You’re an amazing wife, Lisa, but there’s always room for improvement,” he said, completely unaware of the line he was crossing.
The paper read: “Lisa’s Weekly Routine for Becoming a Better Wife.” It was a detailed schedule dictating my every move, based on Steve’s warped idea of what a wife “should” do.
According to the list, I was expected to wake up at 5 a.m. to cook Jake a gourmet breakfast, hit the gym, clean the house, do laundry, and prepare dinner every night—all while holding down a full-time job. It was sexist, demeaning, and completely absurd. But instead of reacting, I smiled.
“You’re absolutely right, Jake,” I said sweetly. “I’ll start tomorrow.”
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